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New York-based Jesus H Christ and the Four Hornsmen of the Apocalypse
are an eight-piece rock/pop/punk/folk/metal/cabaret band. Likened
to B-52s meets X-Ray Spex meets Weezer meets Blood Sweat and Tears,
the JHC "difference" is horny, thinking-person's, emotionally-bare
lyrics protectively cloaked in hard candy pop. All original, stylishly
diverse, stick-in-your-head songs about being bicoastal, stealing
your boyfriends' Kenneth Anger and Balzac references, compassion
fatigue, boobs, Old Lyme, and widower-lust, with roaring guitars
and celestial horns. Poignant, laughable, awash in sound and fury,
signifying nothing, but saying everything that no one usually
dares to say, JHC&TFHotA are really just eager to be held
and loved. At which point they'll become distant and forget to
buy toilet paper.
JHC&TFHotA members have played with Prince, Elvis Costello and Twiggy, with the Metropolitan Opera Orchestra, under the direction of Leonard Bernstein, on Broadway in numerous shows including Dirty Rotten Scoundrels, Wicked and in The Producers. Literary credits include a Pushcart Prize, and authoring the book Taxi Driver Wisdom. One "member" invented a beer called High & Mighty.
Download Jesus H Christ and the Four Hornsmen of the Apocalypse EPK
www.sonicbids.com/jesushchristandthefourhornsmenoftheapocalypse
THE CRITICS ON JHC:
"Hysterical!" "Glorious!" "Neurotic!"
"Sardonic!" "Hard!" "Awesome!" "Bald!"
(See below...)
The
New Yorker: ""This lovable local
band transcends the novelty of its name with wry, thundering power-pop
songs about such previously underexplored subjects as the boredom
of living in the Constitution State (Connecticut Is for Fucking),
the appeal of the recently widowed (Do Me), and how pharmaceuticals
can help love (Happy Me)."
David
Menconi No Depression: "Picture
NRBQ with a metallic pop edge and an expanded horn section, fronted
by a singer who looks a bit like Julia Louis Dreyfus, sounds a
bit like Sarah Vowell and writes a bit like Amy Rigby only much
nastier. There you have this wonderful New York band, who will
completely rock your world. Risa Mickenberg and Joel Sheltons
songs are side-splittingly funny, starting with Connecticuts For
Fucking (because its a place where thats all there is to do) and
its turn-on-a-dime shifts between metallic snarl and acoustic
jingle-jangle. Happy Me cops the Beatles Nowhere Man guitar riff
for a bridge. Vampire Girls rollcalls the slyest geek-culture
hall of fame this side of High Fidelity. And weve had great fun
in my social circle debating which acquaintance is most like the
shrewish hellion in Obviously. Best of all, the music holds up
after the laughter subsides."
Jason MacNeil Pop
Matters: "JHC&TFHotA are an odd
blend of Sixpence None the Richer, Arcade Fire, and New Pornographers
if they were all fronted by Amy Sedaris. “Connecticut’s
for Fucking” is a hard-the-soft-then-hard power pop tune
that talks about the Nutmeg State with sweet, sugary harmonies
in the chorus as she simulates what Robin Williams once described
as “the bone dance”. “Happy Me” is a somewhat
tamer pop tune with Risa Mickenburg on reedy lead vocals, and
Mickenburg nails the conversational and brassy rocker “Obviously”
with a Lou Reed-like charm. A lot of the songs would be great
on Desperate Housewives, particularly the opportunistic and cheery
“Do Me”. ... The summer-sounding pop of “Vicki
Is a Pro” is great, resembling a cross between the Cars
and the Go-Gos. Ditto for the fabulous “It’s OK in
the USA”. “Vampire Girls” name-drops Syd Barrett,
Tiny Tim, Malcolm X, and others while the punk riffs blend with
horns. Another highlight is the rather mainstream bubblegum pop
of “Ellen’s Bi Coastal”. “Steve Baylor”
has to be one of the oddest, Zappa-like tracks of the year, and
“Nipples” is a modern day hit the Turtles failed to
get around to."
George Smith - The Village Voice:
"An eight-person horn-fired local group making glorious hard
pop!" “Hammering punkarama, namechecking Saul Bellow,
Philip K. Dick, and Jerry Lewis.” “Horns and guitar
drive a tank made of suntanned California riff right out of the
speakers.”
Robert Christgau - The Village Voice- Consumer
Guide- Pick Hits: "Risa Mickenberg writes and sings
satirical theater songs accompanied by g-b-d-and-sometimes-k,
two trumpets, and two trombones. All assume the p.o.v. of a neurotic
young professional woman—loan officer, publicist, social
planner, perhaps even actress—who may be Risa Mickenberg.
Some of these songs are funny, the rest very funny. \"Connecticut's
for F*cking\" seems self-explanatory, \"Ellen's Bicoastal\"
cl*se enough; \"Happy Me\" is about falling in love
on meds, \"Vampire Girls\" about sucking knowledge from
your boyfriends. The jewel is the jealous fit \"Obviously\"—\"I
don't care. I mean I think she's a skank, but whatever, I don't
care. I just don't see why you're denying it when it's obvious
you two slept together . . . \" You'll like it or you won't.
In the latter case, don't send me your jokes. A MINUS
Ira Robbins - Trouser Press : "...Sardonic
adult humor in music is amply illustrated by this entertaining
New York octet (half of it being the Four Hornsmen, who add to,
without ever overwhelming, the simple rock music with brass).
Delivered in Risa Mickenberg's winning matter-of-fact voice, "Connecticut's
for F*cking" is hysterical, a deadly putdown of the Nutmeg
State as a nadir of middle-class tedium that proffers copulation
as the only entertaining alternative. And "Vampire Girls,"
which passingly sounds like the Replacements' "I Don't Know,"
explodes the little-known problem of women "who seem like
they're really cool until you realize that everything that's cool
about them is something they sucked out of their ex-boyfriends"
with a laundry list of modern-trendy Henry Higgins acquisitions,
from Balzac to Karen Black, Iggy Pop to Photoshop...
Linda
Ray- Tucson Weekly:
"If you read and loved A Confederacy of Dunces or A Heartbreaking
Work of Staggering Genius, this record is for you. This is not
loud, mad music, though, nor is it as frivolously confrontational
as the band name, or the equally stupid cover art. Rather, it's
a collection of intelligently observant and wryly amusing pop/rock/punk
takes on gender politics (read: sex and its complications), the
state of the United States (especially Connecticut) and certain
everyday characters and their quirks. All are set in fine musicianship,
with Brian Wilson-worthy harmonies and imaginative arrangements.
(The timely entry of horns on "Do Me" made me laugh
out loud.) Lead singer Risa Mickenberg's voice is peculiar in
a way that's perfectly suited to the lyrics, all written by Mickenberg
with guitarist/vocalist Joel Shelton. Favorite track: "Vampire
Girls"--fascinating women who only know what ex-boyfriends
taught them about."
The
Boston Herald: "Hilarious!" "Deadpan!"
"Love!" "Nervy and mighty amusing!"
Nikki D'Andrea- Phoenix New Times: "Once you've heard "Connecticut's for Fucking," the leadoff track to JHC&tFHotA's debut album, there's no denying this band's snarky brilliance. The song's ridiculously catchy pop beat; dorky, nasal punk vocals (courtesy of the surprisingly sexy Risa Mickenberg); and lampooning of noodling '80s metal guitar solos is like a bubblegum enema flushing pop punk out of mainstream music's bloated colon."
Hartford Courant (COURANT.COM)
"The lyrics and subject matter are off-kilter, but they're mostly smart and, to my ears, pretty funny, and the musicians have serious chops. And, as the band's name implies, there's plenty of dizzying horn work on the album, mixed with pounding bass and snarling punk guitar riffs. (The album) also features songs about anti-depressants, seducing the bereaved and psychic vampires: "Girls who seem like they're really cool until you realize everything that's cool about them is something they sucked out of their ex-boyfriends," be it how to fix cars or appreciating the music of Syd Barrett.”
The News Observer(Raleigh, Chapel Hill, NC)
“The comedy record of the year, with side-splitting musings on life, love and the pursuit of happiness set to razor-sharp bar-band pop-rock. It's smart, it's catchy, the music is great.”
New York Magazine: "Smart, catchy power pop!"
Tom Hull- F5 Wichita: "Anyone who fondly remembers the Waitresses will have a leg up on this smart, funny, and exuberantly horny band. Not sure whether the difference is a generation of progress in spite of backlash or just that lead singer Risa Mickenberg writes her own lines. Her critique of "Vampire Girls" is spot on, like she's been one and graduated to being interesting in her own right."
The Boston Globe: “The most raunchy fun!”
Don Wilding- The Cape Codder: "Like Zappa, they'll shock a certain percentage of the population - and absolutely delight the rest of it."
"Time Out New York: (STARRED REVIEW) “Not just
a carpenter and a compassionate religious icon, Jesus H Christ
is also a novelty-pop band fronted by the delightfully baby-voiced
Risa Mickenberg who sings in sugar-sweet tones about being courted
by the crazy guy down the street. Consider it the musical equivalent
to Strangers With Candy.”
The New York Press: "Jesus H
Christ mock all things sacred!” The
Boston Metro "Jesus H Christ and the
Four Hornsmen of the Apocalypse are hilarious!"
The Bosh: "It's time to open
your hearts to Jesus. Jesus H Christ, the totally awesome band...really
does rock."
The Boston Phoenix: "Amy Sedaris!"
"Upscale!" "Sequined!" “Plenty of laughs!”
“Bald!” =
Order the limited collectors' edition first pressing of the JHC debut 13 song CD. Be the envy of everyone you meet and feel like you're still a vibrant human being who actually purchased a CD since you bought the Rushmore soundtrack, you pathetic loser.
CLICK ON THE CD TO ORDER IT NOW! $$$$ Spending money feels good!!!
Jesus
H Christ is:
Joel Shelton – Guitar, Vocals
Risa Mickenberg – Lead vocals
Will Shelton – Bass Guitar, Guitar, Vocals
Ray Grappone – Drums
The Four Hornsmen of the Apocalypse are:
Mike Boschen – Trombone
Wayne DuMaine – Trumpet, Synth, Piano
Chris Olness – Trombone, Percussion
Tim Schadt – Trumpet, Percussion, Piano
Album Credits:
Engineered by the stupendous Vicki Bell.
Mixed by Dave Lee, who engineered albums by The Beastie Boys,
The The and The Bad Brains.
Mastered by Alan Douches at West West Side Music whose mastering
credits include Animal Collective, Sufijan Stevens, and Hole
Recorded at the great Hipbone Studios, Brooklyn.
Produced by Joel Shelton and Risa Mickenberg. All songs written
by Mickenberg/Shelton.
Venues: Joe’s Pub at the Public Theater, The Knitting Factory,
The Cutting Room, The Living Room, Pianos, Mo Pitkin’s House
Of Satisfaction, Tribeca Rock Club, Stephen’s Talkhouse
(Amagansett), Coney Island USA, CBGB, Galapagos Art Space, Arlene
Grocery, Barbes, Meow Mix, Halcyon, C-Note, The Red Lion, The
Sidewalk Café, Suite 16, The Middle East Cambridge, Radio
Bean Burlington, Moan & Dove Amherst, The Colony Café
Woodstock, and 12 Bar Club London.
JHC have played private parties, including: Riot Manhattan and
the The Bridge Cafe and they'll do it again, dammit.
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